Valentine's Day Tips: Action Steps for Healthy Relationships

o Be yourself–avoid comparing yourself to others. Accept yourself as you are now, but be
willing to change. Be honest, honor your integrity and be emotionally open.
o Look people directly in the eyes–avoid staring or glaring. When you communicate, concentrate on direct eye contact. This is an important non-verbal indicator of self-confidence and shows interest in the other person.
o Find positive attributes in people. It is easy to find fault and negatives. Illuminating another’s positive attributes enhances their self-esteem and yours. You cannot recognize a positive attribute in another without having the same attribute. Thus, when you illuminate another’s positive attribute you are illuminating your own as well.
o Write all the positive attributes about yourself and others–you can use this as a reminder when things seem difficult in the  relationship .
o Smile! Your smile is your best feature. Your smile is the window to your inner being–let your light shine for others to see.
o Be affectionate daily with your significant other. Research shows that people who regularly give and receive affection live longer and are less stressed. Make a habit of greeting a loved one with a hug and a kiss.
o Set boundaries–no matter how difficult–to take care of yourself.
o Be clear about who you are and what you want–your limits regarding time, money, and things you will or won’t engage in.
o Share your dreams, wishes and hopes–knowing that you might not complete them. Encourage your significant other/friends to share theirs.
o Explore the options for taking care of recreational needs. Make a list of likes and dislikes and share this list with your significant other/friends. Ask them to share their needs as well.
o List your priorities and do more things that give you energy.
o Have fun–skip, sing, dance, be silly–let yourself be carefree.
o Take a mental health day (R&R) without guilt or regret. Read a book, garden, take a walk, climb a hill, be near water, nature and fire, or sit and do nothing.
o Give undivided time and attention each week to those close to you.
o Say, ‘NO’ without guilt or regret to requests outside your energy/boundary level.
o Make time for friends. Friendships need nurturing.
o Remember time spent with someone is a way of showing love.